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251 I am in need of nothing but the truth.

MT: What do I need today? Truth. That's a cryptic statement, a sudden change from yesterday's "let me not see myself as limited."
JC: You see it as a sudden change? It follows perfectly, when you look at it more closely.
MT: You mean, if I see myself as limited, I need the truth. Or, if I see myself as the limitless Son of God, I need nothing. I've got Truth.
JC: Both make sense, do they not?
MT: OK, this is pretty academic, but I did want to understand the connection. What I need right now is a reminder of God's world. I am looking for the feeling of God, call it Truth if you will.
JC: You know I love you. You know God loves you. Do not spin out the carpet of time any longer with thoughts of ugliness, despair, or regret. You know angels and teachers hover about, ready to lend a hand whenever you ask.
MT: A friendly universe, this one. How nice. Yes, this is the truth, the only need I have.



252 The Son of God is my identity.

MT: Suppose my driver's license said: Son of God? My bank account said Son of God, and my Social Security number was Son of God? My email address was SonofGod? And everybody else's license, account, SS number, email address also said: Son of God? We would be like ants in an anthill.
JC: Differences would be meaningless. That was your state in the beginning, it can be your state again.
MT: There is a mystery here. We chose to differentiate, now we have a chance to be the same, but why? Did we need to learn something of value, is that why we did it?
JC: You thought you left God, now you have the chance to be "as Gods," one and all.
MT: But how did the impossible happen? How did the idea even occur to anybody? We were doing quite well, thank you, back in Eden, and then we chose to leave, to wage war against each other, to declare God dead. How could a part of God split away?
JC: It was lunacy. Would you rather believe that this actually took place? That the ego is real, death rules, and the one who dies with most toys wins?
MT: No, I don't want to believe that. I want to turn my back on it. I want to wake up from the dream. Let me remember today: the Son of God is my identity.
JC: Together, as one, you can rebuild Paradise.

252 The Son of God is my identity.

 



253 My Self is ruler of the universe.

My ego could get all puffed up with that idea! It could explode! Now I can do, be, have anything I want! Except that . . . except that everyone is family. I couldn't possibly want what the neighbor has (I know that more for him is not less for me), or wish someone dead (what good could that possibly do?), or want a million bucks so's to be safe (safety is not for sale). So my Self is ruler of a very different universe than the world of the ego. My Self rules my mind, my mind makes up the world I see, or worlds upon worlds that I haven't conceived of yet. What a promise, and it comes from God Himself.

254 Let every voice but God’s be still in me.

MT: Sometimes it's hard, JC! The voice of panic drowns out every other sound. The voice of pain overwhelms the body. The voice of sadness and grief--that, I can accept, is of my own making. But those others seem quite out of my control.
JC: This is a journey to wholeness, dear sister, a journey, not a static condition. Look at the path you have already traveled, not the miles to the destination.
MT: Ah, yes. My tendency is to look ahead and suffer where I am because I'm not somewhere else yet.
JC: So what to do about that? Would God want to rob you of present enjoyment? Did God say, "Figure it all out right now, or else?" I think not.
MT: My habit of figuring it all out is quite tenacious. I really would love to let go of it.
JC: Yes, but you still cherish figuring things out. You think it an asset. You hold on to it, your fingers stiff with the effort.
MT: I give up! God wins! Let every voice but God's be still in me.


255 This day I choose to spend in perfect peace.

MT: Father, I am still fighting you, after all these years!
God: What was it you said?
MT: I am still fighting you, after all these years. Sometimes it's as if I had never taken this Course.
God: I do not know anything about that. You can have my love and peace, like everybody else, saint and sinner alike. You do not have to purify yourself to earn my peace.
MT: But I have to wish for it.
God: Peace will never be imposed upon you, that is true.
MT: That is why you have me say I "choose" peace! Or not. Yegads, God, I would rather be a victim! If you'd only force me to be at peace, then I could have peace and it would be your responsibility.
God: Once more, I do not know anything about that. I give love as the sun gives light. Hide under a black umbrella as long as you wish, come out into the light when you are ready. I will always welcome you in my arms. You are my creation, and I never forget my creations.



256 God is the only goal I have today.

Guess we need lots of reminders. I know I do. After all the work I've done to retain this new way of thinking, I still fall into the same old ways. Right now my "problem" is random, scattered ego thoughts--what shall I do today, let me make a list, who said what to whom, should I have said what I said? I look to myself for guidance, but I know my ego is a pompous, arrogant attachment. It is not the real me. Fortunately, I am more removed from this attachment, it's like a pesky fly that tries to land on the nearest square inch of flesh. Today, God, let me practice mutuality: what can I do to please you? How can I join my brothers in that eternal, numinous Presence?

256 (2006) God is the only goal I have today.


MT: Tried to let God the Father in by meditating, but I've lost (temporarily, I hope) some kind of connection. Even you, JC, seem removed right now. I know, I know, that's my doing . . .
JC: I am as close to you as your willingness to hear.
MT: Don't know what happened. The bodywork of yesterday? Something changed in my bodymind. Doesn't seem evil, just neutral. Part of my journey.
JC: Part of the ebbs and flows of your consciousness, yes. Essential? Probably not, but it is helpful to fully experience the separation so that you can fully experience the connection.
MT: To become conscious of duality as one emerges into unity. I like that.
JC: What is the feeling tone of this?
MT: I feel detached, indifferent, neutral. The house is quiet at this early hour. I'm good just sitting here. The computer is quite a companion, my window on the world. It's less scary than the emptiness of nothing. We are becoming a global village through a piece of technology. What a revolution.
JC: Soon there will be no secrets, no private lives. Not that there ever was a private self, but you did not know that.
MT: I'm bored, JC. I could use some change in my life, a challenge of sorts.
JC: You have been challenged recently. You are offering love where there is grief and emptiness. Do not look elsewhere. Your world is here, now. Make full use of it. God walks with you. I walk with you.
MT: God walks with me through the valley of the shadow of death--my only goal today.

256  (2008) God is the only goal I have today.

MT: Well, I can't say that. I want to lose weight, to take hold of my finances, to contact Lori and Chris and Carol . . . to weed the garden, to get along with Sarah . . .
JC: And God stands, unchanged and unchanging, behind all these efforts to bring the joy of God into your life.
MT: God, the "I" that looks on these multiple goals.
JC: Make God your goal, and everything else will fall into place.



257 Let me remember what my purpose is.

MT: It is good to get back on schedule with these posts. Watched a lot of TV and feel slightly headachy and logey. Why do I do what I would not do, and not do what I would?
JC: Instead of asking why, leave your weakness behind. Do not spend one moment lamenting the work of the ego. Your purpose is lofty beyond comprehension.
MT: My purpose is forgiveness. Everything else springs from it. How quickly I forget.
JC: Keep it in your mind today, all day, all night. Your function is forgiveness. That is how you go past the interference of the ego.
MT: I invite God and all angels and prophets to accompany me today.
JC: From your mouth into God's ear.

257  Let me remember what my purpose is.


MT: So often I feel confused--what shall I do, this, that, or the other? And while I am doing one, a dozen others clamor for attention.
JC: Seemingly clamor for attention. Nothing exists outside yourself, but your mind wanders. It is possible to focus entirely on the moment.
MT: To make the smallest task into a meditation.
JC: Yes. That is a step toward Unity.
MT: When I see others with anger or judgment, I am splitting the world into shards.
JC: You are, and your purpose is to roll back the carpet of time by letting go of anger and judgment. Love is your function, your purpose, your life--not anger or criticism or fault finding.
MT: I want to walk the world with serene eyes and a quiet mind, today. Today I remember my purpose, the one God gave me as my birthright.


257 Let me remember what my purpose is.

So much for grand plans and boundless ambition! My purpose is to reawaken the memory of God in my brother and myself. Not big money, not fame, not the fanciest house on the block nor the fastest car on the freeway. My purpose is to remember God, and for that I need forgiveness. Without forgiveness I will still be blind.



258 Let me remember that my goal is God.


MT: I would like to feel at home in my body, but it's not a mansion of the mind. It is a rickety dwelling, like the Rio slums made of tin and scrap wood. I watch my grandkids bounce around, little Sarah the dancer, so erect, so elegant, so totally at ease. I must have had this ease and grace when I was a child. Where did it go? I lost it in my teens, I believe--the mind making up all sorts of defects and shortcomings that I must then conceal at all costs.
JC: Your home is not here. It never was the body. Your home is with the Father. Do not attempt to make a home out of a shabby imitation of God's grace.
MT: But I must have locked up emotions and attitudes in my body. Shame for who I thought I was lodged deep in my flesh. A relaxed exterior mirrored my put-on friendly personality, but deep inside I was screaming.
JC: Clever analysis will only get you deeper into the ego. You know this is all an illusion and does not exist. If you could transform your body into what you desire, you would still have to look for God. People with “perfect” bodies still long for God, in the end.
MT: So I may as well shoot for the Grand Kahuna and the rest will follow, or not, it won't matter then.
JC: Yes. Look no further. Your goal is God, the body but an idol and distraction.



259 Let me remember there is no sin.

MT: Mankind has looked to purify itself for all recorded history. Along with the belief we are our bodies, the belief in sin ranks a close second. Organized religion is terrified of a sinless world.
JC: Where would it be then? There would be no more need for it.
MT: And I? Today? Where am I feeding the belief in sin?
JC: Look, instead, on how far you have gone, how much you have learned. The belief in incompleteness is itself a belief in sin, and has to go.
MT: I am complete and whole in God. I never was a sinner. I could not be a sinner, because God did not create me thus, and God must know what he's doing! This little ego of mine, pasted together of cardboard and spit, thinks it knows more than God!
JC: There is no sin. The Son of God is free.



260 Let me remember God created me.

MT: But I did that yesterday! The idea came up all by itself.
JC: Does that surprise you? These ideas are all connected. They follow from each other.
MT: Sometimes they don't seem to. Occasionally, I ask, where did THAT come from?
JC: When you run into an idea that seems disconnected from the rest, it is one you haven't integrated yet. That's all.
MT: So, you're telling me I did not create myself. I am a creature of God, occupying a body as a short-term tenant.
JC: Good way to put it.
MT: Let me say, JC, that's a very comforting idea. It dispels the fear of death and annihilation. In this culture, we live under the terror of death, and our crass attempts to prolong life attest to this terror. We create a complete thought system around the denial of death, which doesn't exist! It is the dreaded Gom-Boo disease that religion seeks to cure!
JC: So, today, will you let the brilliant light of God show you the way?
MT: I could not do otherwise, JC. God is inevitable. I will not use the body's eyes today.

260 Let me remember God created me.

I came from God, and to God I shall return. I occupy this body as a tenant only. My body is just the configuration of my ego. How did God create me? God created me perfect, a being of light. No more heaviness! Today I claim my natural state as Son of God.


 

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