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361 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would
follow You, Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


MT: I don't feel very peaceful this instant, JC, so I guess it's not a holy one! Waves of sadness wash over me. Nina's death months ago, and now my father-in-law's pathetic, agonizing decline, they seem to color all that I see in shades of gray. Where Nina went, there go I. Just give me a swift departure rather than a protracted breakdown of the body.
JC: Behold your value and your worth in the eyes of God.
MT: I can't negate what I feel.
JC: No, and you should not, but know that these sad thoughts are of your making. They are not God's will.
MT: I feel a lifting of the veil, as I behold my worth in the eyes of God. I do tend to think I'm worthless and of no use to anyone.
JC: This has been the theme of your life, hasn't it?
MT: All the way back to my teens! I knew I was hiding my light under a bushel, but I couldn't give with joy. I could not give fully. I gave with one hand and held back with the other. JC, you tell me what that's all about.
JC: You cannot get light by examining darkness, dear sister. Let there be light.

361 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would
follow You, Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


As another year ends, thank you for Your love, Father. Thank you for the universe contained in a drop of dew. Thank you for plants and their loving energy. Thank you for family and friends and the beauty all around me. Thank you for showing me the way Home.

361 This holy instant would I give to You.
Be You in charge. For I would follow You,
Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


MT: I am Son, God is Father. I do what I can, the rest is up to God. Now, the only thing is to determine what I really, really want.
JC: Peace is what you really, really want.
MT: I get confused with things of Earth. There is still the feeling that I haven't accomplished what I set out to do when I came.
JC: Peace comes first, then is your secondary purpose revealed.
MT: That is the most difficult task, Bro. I am mostly at peace, but from time to time I read Joseph Campbell or some other sage and I think: omigod, I forgot to do It!
JC: Enjoy your day. Be a child again. Laugh a lot, love fully, fear not.
MT: And thus I give this holy instant to God.



362 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would
follow You, certain that Your direction gives me peace.


MT: Well, my mind is less chaotic today, JC. Perhaps chaos is good. It makes me appreciate order.
JC: God uses the unlikeliest means to bring you closer to Him.
MT: Today, now, as I look to this day, what would you say to me?
JC: Behold the glory that is yours! Do not for one moment believe that God would have otherwise.
MT: This holy instant I give to God. He is in charge by my request. I've hired God, as I hire a doctor or a teacher.
JC: That is partnership. Partnership with power beyond your wildest imaginings.
MT: I wrote the word "order". There's something about order that feels calm and Godlike.
JC: The order of the spheres, the axis of the cosmos. Therein lies the peace of God.

362 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would
follow You, Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


I can make holy any instant in time, by giving it to God and thus stepping into timelessness. This is my partnership with awesome power, mine for the asking.



363 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would follow You, certain that Your direction gives me peace.

JC: How are you, right now, reading these words that you know so well?
MT: I am distracted and confused.
JC: Come back to Me.
MT: I need comfort, don't know why the unquiet, the restless mind.
JC: All you need to know is, unquiet is being made up, and peace is a lot easier!
MT: Peace is easier. I need do nothing. I can even do things while not-doing them. But I feel rather removed from God's direction these days. Peace comes and goes, mostly goes, and at times I feel bereft of hope.
JC: You have circled the campfires of the soul for a long, long time.
MT: So I have, JC. But I cannot shove certainty where doubt still resides.
JC: Do not attempt to beat yourself into the Kingdom. The Kingdom is a soft moment, a loving event, an instant of recognition. Once seen it cannot ever be forgotten.

363 This holy instant would I give to You.
Be You in charge For I would follow You,
Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


This is the end of another year, JC. I invite you to come along as I go on my way. Hold my hand, show me the way.



364 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would follow You, certain that Your direction gives me peace.


MT: I want these words to be more than words. I want the holy instant to penetrate every fiber of my being.
JC: And it will. It does. It has.
MT: I allow God to guide me today and always. He is in charge by my request.
JC: I walk with you. Where we are, there God is. The holiest of all the spots on earth is where an ancient hatred has become a present love.


364 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would follow You, certain that Your direction gives me peace.

The instant is holy because I give it to God. Any instant can be the holiest in all recorded time, when I give it to God. He is in charge by my request! How wonderful, the God within, my Rock of Ages.

364 This holy instant would I give to You.
Be You in charge. For I would follow You,
Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


Thank you, God, for this magnificent Course, our way Home.
Thank you, Helen Schucman and Bill Thetford, for your selfless dedication.
I am grateful for another year that I get to walk the Earth with my brothers.
Thank you, God, for showing me the way to peace. Life is beautiful.



365 This holy instant would I give to You. Be You in charge. For I would
follow You, certain that Your direction gives me peace.


MT: Here I am, JC. Another year draws to an end. I still long for God.
JC: You can be sure God hasn't shut you out.
MT: You're kidding! I thought I was the one sinner God couldn't forgive, much as He tried.
JC: Your ego put together the ultimate challenge to God, and dreams it is the winner.
MT: Monica 1, God 0. But what have I won?
JC: You have won the right to continue to struggle. God will never take that from you.
MT: This truly is a tiny, mad idea, and I've let it run my life.
JC: And now?
MT: Now I stop this insane endeavor. I allow the Great Silence. God Is.


365 This holy instant would I give to You.
Be You in charge For I would follow You,
Certain that Your direction gives me peace.


This--right now--right here. Not next year after I crawl to Mecca on my knees. Not after I've studied the Course and underlined every word. Not when I have that new car, or money for medication, or made peace with my daughter. The time is now, the place is here. Be you in charge.


 

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